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Author: roguelionmedia
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SCOTUS Deliberates if CA. Law Outlawing Bannon from Looking Disheveled in Public Unconstitutional
WASHINGTON, D.C.—The nation’s highest court confronted a shaggy legal quandary Tuesday as justices weighed oral arguments over a California law requiring Steve Bannon to appear “at least moderately kept” in public. The law, stating Bannon must be “clean-shaven, freshly laundered, and not emitting an odor detectable within a fifteen-foot radius,” has ignited debate over personal…
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God says He and Trump not talked since before first Epstein Party, and particularly not About War
Heaven — In an exclusive revelation that’s left theologians and White House press secretaries scrambling for new talking points, God announced Tuesday that He has not spoken to Donald Trump “since sometime before the guest list for that first Epstein party went out.” The statement came just hours after President Trump boldly asserted, “God is…
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Supporters Still Patiently Awaiting Campaign Promise of Free Tickets to “Gullible’s Getaway Weekend”
PALM BEACH, FL — For the seventh consecutive year, diehard MAGA enthusiasts nationwide are clinging to hope that their long-awaited campaign promise of an all-expense-paid weekend at Mar-a-Lago for the “Gullibles Getaway Weekend”—a resort package repeatedly teased by Donald Trump at campaign rallies and promised in exchange for their vote—will finally come to fruition. The…
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Trump Fires Bondi Says, “Wasn’t Aggressively Prosecuting” Prom Date Snub from 1964
In a bizarre twist that even the most seasoned devout MAGA followers are struggling to process, President Donald Trump has fired Attorney General Pam Bondi. The reason? Her alleged failure to “aggressively prosecute” what Trump claims was a life-altering injustice: his supposed snubbing at the 1964 Wharton High School Prom. The Risible reached out to…
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Trump Tells America War Will End When Ayatollah Recinds “Tiny Hands Trump” Comment
President Donald Trump announced at a last-minute White House press conference that peace is possible—if the Ayatollah retracts his “Tiny HandsTrump” remark. “War ends when he takes it back,” Trump declared, waving his hands. “Everyone’s talking. Tremendous hands. Huge hands. Ask Melania!” Sources say the U.S.-Iran conflict, ignited by an exchange of absurd insults, peaked…
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And, April’s Winner is….(Again)
April 2026 Risible Award: Congress Earns Its Clown Shoes—Again It’s hard to pick just one low point in American politics these days, but the recurring circus in Congress—where a routine government funding bill once again became a battleground—deserves a special prize. Historically, both parties have used shutdown threats as leverage, and this time is no…
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MISCELLANEOUS STORIES
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ICE Arrests Count von Count as Work Visa Revoked Following PBS Defunding
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Post Annual Physical, President Declares He Has “Most Perfect Prostate” Ever Digitally Examined
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Trump Fumes as Ship Transporting Paddleballs Destined for Administration Staff, Detained in Hormuz
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Trump Nominates “Little” Vinny DeVito, Miami Serve-Pro Wet-vac Technician, to Lead FEMA