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Category: People in the News
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SCOTUS Deliberates if CA. Law Outlawing Bannon from Looking Disheveled in Public Unconstitutional
WASHINGTON, D.C.—The nation’s highest court confronted a shaggy legal quandary Tuesday as justices weighed oral arguments over a California law requiring Steve Bannon to appear “at least moderately kept” in public. The law, stating Bannon must be “clean-shaven, freshly laundered, and not emitting an odor detectable within a fifteen-foot radius,” has ignited debate over personal…
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And, April’s Winner is….(Again)
April 2026 Risible Award: Congress Earns Its Clown Shoes—Again It’s hard to pick just one low point in American politics these days, but the recurring circus in Congress—where a routine government funding bill once again became a battleground—deserves a special prize. Historically, both parties have used shutdown threats as leverage, and this time is no…
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This Month in History
April 2, 1513 – Spanish explorer Ponce de Leon sighted Florida and claimed it for the Spanish Crown after landing at what is now St. Augustine. About 500 Jewish and Italian seniors, traveling with their golf carts, disembarked from de Leon’s ship just in time for a 3 p.m. early senior discount dinner at the St.…
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Thank you, Joe. You’ve Been Poked in the Risible.
Congratulations, Mr. S. You are (once again) all in a class all of your own. You are the recipient of the Risible’s very first Poke. We love you. We’re fans, and we hope you and your attorneys have a sense of humor, too. If this ever reaches you, please send us a note from our…
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Trump Supporters Worry That Cuts to NEA May Impact Ted Nugent Action Figure Museum
Trump fans are usually the first to cheer when someone threatens to cut government funding, but this week, many of them found themselves in a strange spot: suddenly worried about the National Endowment for the Arts. Why? Turns out, cutting the NEA might pull the rug out from under the Ted Nugent Action Figure Museum—a…
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Stressed by Hours of Repetition, Mother Strangles Both Marco and Polo at Local Hotel Pool
ORLANDO, FL — Spectators describe the scene as “less tragedy, more prophecy.” After what authorities counted as the 147th uninterrupted round of the pool game that has claimed more sanity than sunburns, a local mother, vacationing with her family, finally snapped and strangled both Marco and Polo during peak splash hour at the Marriott Courtyard…
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MISCELLANEOUS STORIES
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ICE Arrests Count von Count as Work Visa Revoked Following PBS Defunding
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Post Annual Physical, President Declares He Has “Most Perfect Prostate” Ever Digitally Examined
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Trump Fumes as Ship Transporting Paddleballs Destined for Administration Staff, Detained in Hormuz
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Trump Nominates “Little” Vinny DeVito, Miami Serve-Pro Wet-vac Technician, to Lead FEMA