This Week at the White House
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Trump Nominates “Little” Vinny DeVito, Miami Serve-Pro Wet-vac Technician, to Lead FEMA
In a move that surprised nearly every government official, President Trump on Thursday nominated Vincent “Little Vinny” DeVito—a part-time wet-vac…
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Mystery Solved for Millions Missing for Trump Library
WASHINGTON, D.C. — For months, investigators have been puzzled over the mysterious disappearance of $100 million designated for the Donald…
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Trump Properties Awarded Contract to Manage Toll Booth and New McDonald’s at “Golden Arches de Trump”
The federal government announced today that Trump Properties, Inc. has been awarded a “lifetime contract” to manage both the toll…
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F.C.C. Chair Threatens Suit with D.C. Chinese Buffet Over President’s Unfavorable Cookie Fortune
During a recent Fox News interview, the FCC Chair promised legal action after President Trump received a fortune cookie that…
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Leavitt Flaunts New IEP, says Allows her Extended Time to Make up Believable Stories
WASHINGTON — In a surprise press briefing, White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt announced she’s now on an Individualized Education…
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Trump Fires Bondi Says, “Wasn’t Aggressively Prosecuting” Prom Date Snub from 1964
In a bizarre twist that even the most seasoned devout MAGA followers are struggling to process, President Donald Trump has…
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Tuesdays at the WH—Cabinet Always Giddily Awaits Weekly Play Raid with Eric’s “Injuns”
Just after 3 p.m. every Tuesday, anticipation settles over the West Wing. Cabinet members, exchanging nervous giggles, rummage through the…
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WH Says Children Will Now Require $5 Million Gold Card to Participate in 2027 Easter Egg Roll
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move White House officials are calling “the logical next step in American childhood,” the Trump…
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D.C. Law Firms Agree to Trump’s Demand That Staff Dress Like Pinocchio During Federal Court Appearances
Several top Washington, D.C., law firms have agreed to President Trump’s new rule: attorneys opposing the administration in federal court…
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