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Tag: James Bond
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DHS Pick Mullin Boasts of ‘Special Assignments’ Abroad, Alludes He Once Dated ‘Pussy Galore’
Washington, D.C. — President Trump announced today that Oklahoma Senator Markwayne “Skeeter” Mullin is his pick for Secretary of Homeland Security. The nomination, widely seen as a nod to America’s love of rugged individualism and men who allegedly own more camo than furniture, has already sparked controversy — not least because of Mullin’s mysterious references…
MISCELLANEOUS STORIES
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ICE Arrests Count von Count as Work Visa Revoked Following PBS Defunding
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Post Annual Physical, President Declares He Has “Most Perfect Prostate” Ever Digitally Examined
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Trump Fumes as Ship Transporting Paddleballs Destined for Administration Staff, Detained in Hormuz
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Trump Nominates “Little” Vinny DeVito, Miami Serve-Pro Wet-vac Technician, to Lead FEMA